Longing for home
I’ve been feeling a bit homesick lately.
I’ve moved so much in my adult life that I’m not really sure where home is anymore. But I know what it feels like. And for me, it’s not so much about a place as it is about real connection. Home is knowing and being truly known. It’s built on a shared history, an established trust and mutual understanding.
That is, a home takes time. It can’t be rushed. It takes energy and intentionality. It takes more than one person and more than one encounter every so often. To make a home takes courage – it requires risk and vulnerability. It will sometimes mean getting hurt so it’s going to need grace and persistence also. These are not all things that I consider myself especially good at!
So, why am I telling you about this? Well a few reasons actually –
First, it’s what I’ve been feeling but you’d never know it unless I tell you about it. See, I sometimes think one of the reasons we get stuck in feeling alone is that we feel it but never say it. If we are going to connect in a real way, we need to be willing to share – not with everyone, but with some.
Second, I’m saying it just to model that it’s ok to be struggling with something. We all of us are broken people, works-in-progress but not yet whole. So, just by virtue of being human we all of us have something going at some level or another. For one its crippling anxiety, for another its persistent doubt, still others suffer with chronic poor health and others with relational stresses or loneliness. Whatever it may look like from afar, none of us has everything together. If you are burdened by something this week, know you are not alone – I’m with you (as is everyone else)!
Third, because there is a blessing to be found in the struggle. It may not always feel like it, but the struggle (whatever it is) helps us remember we’re not home yet. Feeling homesick makes me long for my real home, my eternal home with Jesus. That’s a good thing. God has more in store for us – this place and even these people are not supposed to meet all our needs. It’s that honest realisation which can actually be a great blessing, for it’s in thirsting after God and longing for his face that we most press into him. And it’s when we press into him that we become most satisfied in him. If you are anything like me, I need those moments of feeling my thirst to help me remember again to drink in the only One who can ultimately satisfy. And I need to be confronted with my own frailty to help me lean harder on God, just like the Apostle Paul did when he was very aware of his thorn.
Friends, we are on the way, but we aren’t home yet! Let’s keep encouraging each other and looking out for each other on the journey. Let’s pray with each other and take the risk of being real. And let’s let our struggles remind us to press all the more into our God who truly knows us and who alone can truly satisfy.